Resentment Theater

One thing that sets me apart from the larger ladies who wear only or mostly plus sizes are issues concerning them and thinner women. I might get annoyed with retailers, manufacturers, and designers who treat any woman over a size 6 or 8 as a pariah. I might get annoyed at a media culture that promotes a too-thin image as the ideal. But holding against somebody smaller than me?

Unfortunately, when you are part of a group that has experienced discrimination or exclusion, it's easy to succumb to resentment toward those you think are getting all of the breaks in life. Personal issues of rejection, insecurity, and humiliation become revenge fantasies. I admit to schadenfreude when Jude Law cheated on Sienna Miller--a thin actress held up as a fashion icon and plastered on many a mag cover--with his curvaceous nanny. It's ridiculous, because it doesn't excuse or change the fact Mr. Law was a cheatin' pig or that banging the nanny is just flat out immoral. It was a moment of pettiness.

That said, I'm a little baffled when I see posted on some plus message boards that they don't want to see smaller women shopping in "their" stores or plus designers making stuff for "skinny minnies." On my end, I want just as much respect as other misses customers. I don't care if they make my pants in a 0, just make them in a 16 while they're at it. I won't have a heart attack if I see a five foot tall 80 lb. girl wearing a dress I have. If it looks great on both of us, isn't it a good thing?

Look, anybody can end up fat or skinny. A baby, an illness, stress, etc. can change your body. Grinding your teeth at "those people" isn't going to make you a happier person.